Stepping Out: What I learnt from my first major internship experience

Warning!

This is a very long post but for your viewing pleasure  there shall be cute pictures of chocolate and cats to give your eyes a break every few hundred words... Let me even insert one right now

I'm yet to see this in the Kenyan Market. But looking at it is giving me a food-gasm so somebody bring it already

So, my name is Meg. I am 5ft 8" of pure unadulterated everything. From everything I mean blondness to creativity and a whole lot of brains hidden behind a mask of introversion. For the past 3 months or so I decided to give up my love for pointless addictive reality television read the E channel to engage in something meaningful that was geared towards boosting my CV and gaining that word that gives undergraduates nightmares: EXPERIENCE.
Indeed, it has been quite the EXPERIENCE and I can proudly say this golden opportunity gave me a chance to learn invaluable lessons that are going to make me a better professional.
It should be noted at this point that  I am 20. There are words that make you feel 35 when used at this age. Professional is one of them. And because I hate how I feel very 35 because of the tone the a fore written words use I think it is time to add a bit of a blonde different perspective to my memoirs. So instead of focusing on all the relevant things I learned let us focus on the irrelevant. Because in Campus they teach you to deal with the expected but nobody ever gives you a three hour exam on how to deal with the random. Therefore the following are a list of 9 utterly random shyt things I learned at my first ever internship experience...

Nous commencons...
( I am learning francais by the way so expect a lot of that though but please pardon the francais spellings, my keyboard doesn't recognize those weird things they add on some vowels)

okay this is too cute... admit it. You smiled.

1. Attitude does indeed determine your altitude.

I hate cliche sayings. But this is one cliche saying that I learned to always bear in mind because I learned the hard way that your greatest enemy more often than not is 'you'. Let's just say if you decide to feel small in a room full of giants you will feel small in that room full of giants. And one thing that is for sure is you cannot expect to achieve anything if you go about life feeling like you owe anyone an apology for your existence. In English,  what I am trying to confess is I allowed myself to feel a bit dwarfed primarily because I was that one barely halfway through my undergrad in a room full of people with Masters degrees and above. This attitude kept me from doing a lot: making the necessary networks, asking the questions that perhaps could have gone a long way in shaping my career. And as I look back on how I wish I wasn't so damn reserved, the major lesson I've learnt is never to allow my mind to make me believe I am that small. Really. It benefits no one(except maybe the haters)

And at this point, I believe this article shall take a blonde turn...

2.Informality is for nyamachoma road trips.
It took the blonde moment of the year to learn this one...

So there I was delivering a document to Monsieur Boss of the Bosses. As I enter le assistant's office(which is where documents for Monsieur Boss of the Bosses are placed) I heard someone say hi. So I replied, without turning my head, a shrill 'hi'; in that voice used when you aren't sure if the hi was for you only to realize the voice was from Monsieur Boss of the Bosses who was directly behind me, designer suit and Hugo Boss cologne and everything. Cringe.Immediately  I did this seriously blonde smile and went all 'oh, Good afternoon Sir.' Super super embarrassed.

Allow me to explain why this situation was very bad: informality. I mean who TF says hi to Le Boss all casual like that.  That level of informality could easily be misconstrued as rude.And like, people get fired for rudeness. I think. So the moral lesson of this is: informality is for the rave ama nyamachoma roadtrips out of town. Never for the office. Ever.

how I be feeling when the alarm rings at 5 in the a.m.

      

3. Red lip stick is an asset.
If you are a male reader, feel free to skip to point 4 unless you are a member of this new breed of metros who have better toe-nails than me. (shout out to that dude I saw at the salon one time getting his toes did as the hairdresser sighed at my massive growth LOL)
Anyway lip stick is that which gives you motivation to conquer the world on that day the alarm rings at 5 a.m and it is all rainy outside and you barely slept last night because of a heated Whatsapp conversation. It is amazing what two swipes on your dull full pout can do. It's like that transformation Anne Hathaway had in the Princess Diaries 1, one minute a geeky 15 year old then BAAM, hello caramel Grace Kelly :-)

4. The elevator selfie.
My Instagram is littered with them. And my phone's memory is even worse. Why I take them?
Because I'm a girl and in 2014 that's what we do for fun. Also as a way of ensuring my make up is looking on point; can't afford to go smiling at your boss with lip stick on your pearly whites can you?
It is an art and science whose steps can be summarised in 5 basic steps;

• PLAN: if you plan to take a selfie always walk with the phone/tablet and the camera app ready
• PRESS: get to the elevator and press elevator button
• ENTER THE ELEVATOR
• IF THE ELEVATOR IS EMPTY: quickly unlock phone and do the necessary, be fast because you never know if the elevator shall stop for more people on the next floor
• UPLOAD SELFIE:  feel free to use filter and collage app to modify your photo based on your preferences.

I like this one, all on my suit and bow tie swagg

Not too sure if I was meant to be doing this though ;-/

5. How to type fast.
 I can proudly say my typing speed has quadrupled to like 10,000 words a minute. How?
Data entry. And more importantly, emergency blog posting. Because for a while I didn't have the guest password so my blogging was limited to those moments when I was at a senior's desk who luckily was at a meeting. Let's just say adrenaline is the most powerful drug in the world. Because that fear of le senior walking in before I am done is the reason I nowadays type like I am being chased by the po-po.
And this skill shall not be forgotten for a while.

6. It is possible to build abs without spending a cent at the gym.
Now I usually get wordy but this one can be summarised as follows....

Lifting 10000 weights cannot build muscle the way carrying 5 full box files in one trip can. Doubt me?
Look at the next intern keenly (even me, though this toned torso shall disappear in a few days when I go back to school and resume my fries fries and more fries eating plan)  but for real the muscles those young un's have are to die for.

7.Learn to sound and look like you know a lot when you know nothing at all.
Apparently when some people see me, they see intellect. At least based on the observations I have made around campus. I think it's because I roll with some very sharp ones, those ones that always have a smart question to ask in class. So yeah I understand why people always ask me questions I know nothing about and I have learnt to be quiet, listen and in perfect grammar reply something like, 'sorry, I am not too sure about that perhaps you could ask my friend X, you can get her at place Y or let me call her.'
But at the work place it's another game altogether. I admit that I could however perfect this and work on that blonde look I get when someone asks me about something I don't know a thing about(and this happened a little too too too too too much).
Yes, I have a bad poker face but as for the poker voice(is there something like that even) that one I have become a master at: answering phone calls and politely referring the caller to someone else. Like I think my 'hello, how may I help you' voice is sexy  the one! If I do say so myself( and from what random guys tell me). I think that is a worthwhile lesson.

8. The unwritten commandment: thou shalt learn people's names.
I suck at names. Yes, and I take this chance to very sincerely apologize to all those people who talk to me, know a lot about me but I do not know their names because they are a lot of you. I can't help it, I have grown up in a very tiny family and I am used to only having three emergency contacts (mama, dad-who we shall never forget- and mon frere.) So my mind naturally is not used to knowing a lot of people.I forget.  And this unfortunate tendency of mine is the reason a lot of times when passing messages I'd be like 'someone came looking for you and I told them you were at lunch so they should come... And by the way that requisition bla bla bla,' to carefully avoid any question as to who someone was. It is not funny. Is it like a memory thing, like should I take memory supplements? I don't know but I have learnt that I should always make an effort. Really.

I have a cupcake craving as I type this. Assist me.

 Finally the end....

And this last lesson is not as blonde but please read...

9. Literacy is the key.
A lot of the tasks I did I realized did not need all the crazy calculus and management theories and philosophy I do at school.Actually a lot of the work just required the mere ability to read and write and when I realized this I saw an opportunity. I mean part  of a Boss's duties include basic data entry and I was like why?
I mean Kenya has a major unemployment problem. Imagine if that boss paid someone even if it is just 100 bob (like $1 and some cents for you non Kenyans skimming this )daily to do that work. It might not help much but it would give him more time to engage in more complex duties and it would certainly stop some hungry high school drop out from stealing his side mirror so he can sell it for a plate of food. Think about it. I may not know much but I know living in a 3rd world country doesn't have to be so bad if we only just see these opportunities. But hey, what does Meg know about ending third world problems? But you who knows more, do something because you have the knowledge I lack.


So the end is here....

Those are my lessons. All irrelevant. Still, at least I learnt something besides the usual how offices work, how to handle transactions etc etc.

So what did you learn at your first internship?Tell me. The more irrelevant the better lol.

hell yeah!!!

P.S...

I want to express my gratitude for Monsieur Boss of the Bosses( though I don't know if I'd want him reading this). It has been a once in a lifetime opportunity and I am happy I got it. I could have written a thank you email but I believe in PDA and this is me showing my corporate non-embarassing PDA. After all, Kanye said "why don't we give people flowers while they can still smell them," (the song is so deep it is called Big Brother) so this is my way of showing appreciation. Thank you. A lot.
And thank you for a company policy that does not involve blocking YouTube.

Thank you sir, from Me and my baby cat Booboo


Lastly...All images are from Google Images except the one of my cat above. Also pardon any typos, this post was too long.
Also I have a short attention span( refer to lesson 8).
*Love*