Are We The Righteous Ones?

Guess who is back?

Well I would go into the details of why I haven't posted in a while but that shall be saved for another post.

Today I speak on a matter that is trending all over the 254.
A matter that has struck a serious nerve.

Dressing.
Actually indecent dressing and women's rights to dress or not dress indecently.
Please note that the term indecent is used very lightly because:

1. It is very subjective
2. It is very very subjective
3. It is very very very subjective.

Let's make one thing clear. I am very liberal minded sometimes I even question myself. I love the arts and I am a business student.
I admire people covered in piercings and tattoos just as much as I admire some conservatives who have accomplished some great things.
Most of all I believe at the end of the day everyone should have the right to be themselves.Whatever that means to them. Also I sincerely believe that everybody has the reasons why they do what they do and it is certainly not in my place to judge a fellow mortal just because they sin a little differently than I do.
Sure I may not always agree with what everyone does but I try my best not to condemn others because I'm not the saint. Actually no one is.

That said, here is the thing. I come from a generally conservative family. We avoid super goth piercings and wearing very haute couture fashion which no one really understands because they are just so different.  We are ourselves, we just like to keep it simple. That's why I save my ridiculously bold red lips and layers upon layers of very blingy jewellery for occasions that are not family gatherings because well, we just are that way. Not that if I ever did some Kim K contouring and layered on my favourite red lippie they would put a wet cloth to my face faster than I can say Kardashian or ban me from being one of their own. Just that it wouldn't feel right. At least in the presence of the elder ones.
I love a nice short skater dress just like the next girl but I know better than to wear it when I am going to visit my grandparents. Why? Like I said. We just don't do that.
But if on one occassion I did happen to forget that and wore one do I fear that they would tear it off me? Not exactly. Certainly they would sit me down immediately and give me a heart to heart and offer me a shawl to wrap myself in.
But not publicly humiliate me or violate me in any way.

One thing I know about where I'm from, we are Christians and we believe in correcting with love not in a manner that undermines my dignity as a person. They correct in a way that will help me understand that at the end of the day it is for my benefit not to fulfil their malicious intentions.

Now that that is out of the way let's talk business.

Rule number One:

My dressing is my BUSINESS.Period.

I believe in dressing to impress but the number one person on the impress list is ME.  That means if I wear my pyjamas to the supermarket, I am doing it for me. If I spend a lot on a fancy maxi dress for a wedding full of people I do not even know or who do not even know me, I am doing it for me. If I am feeling some 'typa' way and wear the most androgynous, menswear inspired pair of Khakis and blazer I own, I am doing it for ME. If I wear that body con midi pencil skirt that brings out curves I wish I had, I am doing it for ME.
Not you. Not us. Not them. But ME.

If YOU who is not ME feel so offended by my way of dressing either perhaps it is too conservative (if you are a liberal) or you think I am being too inappropriate (if you are an extreme conservative) quite frankly, you can keep it to yourself. Because I understand every one has a right to an opinion. Just do not freaking shove it in my face unless you have good reason.

And if at all you feel something must be done about it then fine, show me the error in my ways. Maybe I might learn a thing from you. At the end of the day man is a very visual being. That's why I will certainly trust a shop attendant who is looking like something out of a magazine to tell me which skirt makes me look good than I would some one who is looking like they just walked out of bed. I am not vain. It's human nature. Hate me if you want to. It's the truth. We are visual. We want the outside to match what we aspire for in the inside and we are more than elated when we find someone who has done the same.

Back to my point: do not freaking humiliate me in the name of trying to get me to see your point.

Like I said my dressing is for ME. Not You or Us or Them.
That means if you think there is anything wrong with how I dress then correct me in a way that benefits ME.
Not a way that benefits you or them.
But ME.

I heard a male lawyer comment on this issue on the radio and he imagined a scenario where a strict dress code existed in court. If one day he showed up wearing something inappropriate, his superiors would certainly not strip him just because he broke the code. They would remind him of the code and send him home to change because the dress code benefits him and his corporate image.

I totally agree with him. I attend a university that abides by a strict dress code. Fortunately or not I am about 5ft 8, quite tall for my age. That basically means what would be appear as mid length on the average female on me would be knee length or end just above the knee. In my school, anything above the knee is unacceptable. Many at times I have found myself on the wrong because of this but do the dress code assistants strip me just because I broke a rule? Certainly not. They just  send me home to change and with time I have learnt to tow the line.
They correct me in a way that has benefit me because now I know not to wear that skirt that rises too high when I walk
especially on crucial days when I have exams etc. And well I do believe with time I have learnt to portray a good corporate image which matches the career ambitions I have.

We learn by experience and correction.
I have no qualms if you offer me dressing advice that will help me learn.
But find a damn hobby if you will whisper behind my back or humiliate me or any other person just because you hate how I dress. Seriously.  Destructive criticism is that shit that makes aliens think we are retarded.

And now I unapologetically take shots at those who believe in stripping down women just because they believe they are 'indecently' dressed.

I do not know how the victim was dressed so I refuse to make a comment on that bit about whether she was right or wrong.

What I will throw shade on is the very idea let alone act of humiliating her to prove a point.

So to the females who didn't bother to cover her up before and cheered on, do not call yourself a sister. Sisters look out for each other. A real sister should have called her aside and covered her up before these guys had a chance to prey on her shame. I certainly know of random females who have helped me out of potentially embarrassing girl moments so none of this 'it's a stranger so I will not care B.S.'
If you felt too scared to help because I know mobs can be evil, walk away. Do not freaking encourage them.

To those that did that act. I could bring up the idea of night clubs and side chics and expose your hypocrisy but I will not. All I will say is shame on you. How would you like it if that was your sister or daughter? You might say well you would never let them walk out the house that way but really we all know that is not true. Even you know better than to get in the way of a woman set on her ways. So get off that high horse and man up. You could have told her to go back home or given her your coat. That is only and only if you believe her not wearing that clothing item which seemed inappropriate would have been a better decision for HER not a better decision for YOU or YOUR hormones.

To everyone, me included, who at one point has judged another for their mode of dressing whether you thought it too inappropriate or too -dare I say- grandma-ish' let us ask for forgiveness.

I mean are we the righteous ones? Are we? I bring back my earlier point of not judging people just because they sin a little different from us.
Always remember these words...

Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.

https://secure.avaaz.org/en/petition/Hon_Rachel_Shbesh_Ensure_that_such_violation_of_fellow_human_beings_are_not_tolerated/edit/